Monday, February 20, 2012

Hands-off, we all have different perspectives!

This isn't really a 'touchy' subject in my household, it’s just not talked about very often and I'm still very unclear on how I want to direct this issue towards the upbringing of my children. I was raised in a Christian home. We went to church every Sunday, sometimes even during the week. I was part of the church choir, active in Sunday school, had major roles in all the holiday services, went to confirmation classes, youth group outings/retreats & loved every part of the faith-based community we belonged too. My family created strong friendship ties through church and we made lasting memories! Church was fun & without even realizing it, I was learning & following Gods word. My parents never pushed Christianity on me & my brother, they never forced Lutheranism. We have always had our choice to believe in God’s word. My parents gave us the opportunity to learn about God and his creation, they never told us it was the right way to think. I am blessed for this & I would never look back & wish it any differently. I later learned about evolution in school and formed my own beliefs on our existence (Leave this for a later post). My parents gave me an opportunity to learn & grow as an individual and I truly believe the involvement in church has made a strong & a lasting impression on which I am today. Now, we quit going to church regularly when I was in my last few years of high school; our pastor moved on to a different church and I became very active in sports. We decided that our church was not the right place for us any longer and since then I have not actively been part of any faith based community.

My fiancé was not raised up going to church, he was not taught Gods lessons through Sunday school, he was not confirmed or baptized. This does not make him or his family, bad people & certainly does not imply he is not a Christian. Believing in God is completely up to him & I do not believe you need church to make you a better person or a follower of God’s word. Nor do I believe you need to be active in church to speak to god through prayer or ask for forgiveness.

With this said, Bryce & I do not go to church...yet! Bryce has gone a few times with me to my Grandparents church, but it is not even close to a regular routine for either of us. However, we are now forming our own family bond; we now have the decision to teach our child & our future children about Gods word. We have the decision to give Avery the opportunities to learn about God and his creation. He has the choice to actively attend church. We have the choice to get Avery baptized, we have the choice to give Avery the opportunity to learn and socialize with children of the lord. This is something I strongly believe in. I want to give Avery the opportunity to gather with other children and make her own decisions and beliefs of church. I believe it is our job as parents to educate our children in every aspect of society, not just faith. She deserves to know the options, children deserve to learn about a variety of things; and then as they get older they can do the same as I did, form their own decisions, beliefs & standards.

So this leaves me where I am standing today:  Blank, indecisive, scared, and unsure of where to start. Finding a church, whether it’s just for Avery & I to attend, or my whole family, is a scary process. Walking into an organization (which I hate the thought of) alone, unfamiliar, and nervous, is going to take some balls on my part. I have said many times, I'm going to go to this church on Sunday... Yet, I never go. I guess the point of this post is that I’m looking for your views, opinions, and traditions on raising a family with or without church/God involvement and why you choose to do so! I do believe every family has their own beliefs on how to raise their family, so I'm not here to judge your paths, as well as, I hope you’re not here to do so about mine!

This subject should be talked about openly, fully and without embarrassement.
For we are all children of God.



  1. It sounds like we're close to being on the same page in this department! I'm in the same boat. My faith has grown so much in the last few years and I'm not sure where to take it all. I took Gavin to church (not for Sunday service) and it was a disaster.. I can't imagine taking him now, to a place where I don't know anyone. It'd be a nightmare. I think we'll start taking the boys in a few years when they understand they have to sit still or their will be consequences. Gavin understands that now, but he's not even 2.. I can only "punish" him so many times in one hour before it's useless. The kid just hates to sit still.

  2. I wonder if becoming a parent makes you think about this subject more or if it's just us growing up, but this has come across my mind as well. I grew up Catholic...well, until my mother met my step-father. He is Lutheran. Anyways, when my grandfather past away, we stopped going to grandmother got sick and this other jazz. I did however finish communion and I was baptized as a baby. Tim on the other hand was not baptized and never went to church, nor will he ever. He is just not that type of person. And we have decided not to get Ayden baptized. Tim said he would feel like a "fake" person if we did...which honestly, I agree with him. We don't go to church and we don't practice religion regularly. However, I still believe in god and I still pray. I just don't feel like going to church will make me a better person or change how I believe in god or what I believe for that matter. I think you should do what is right for you and your family. I agree with you, that you should give Avery that chance to figure out what she believes in. If Ayden wants to go to church for some reason when he is older and will understand, then I will be more than happy to take him. Just do what is right for you guys.

  3. Thanks for responding ladies! I think I take the subject a little bit more seriously then I led my post to believe too. I really am kinda torn. I do feel Avery needs to be baptised & have godparentsm, I just have to find a way to get Bryce on my "level"!! And Erica I do not think you would be fake if you did, you don't have to go to church to practice any of Gods words, lessons, or beliefs!!! Amanda I completely understand what you mean about bringing loud children into church service, I know there are some churches who have childcare (focused toward God)in them. However, I would ideally love to be able to teach my children to HUSH for 1 hour of service and be able to attend. Hmmm, well see if this ever happens! lol